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(OVER 100 FIVE STAR REVIEWS ACROSS AMAZON AND GOODREADS!)

A fatal mistake catapults Barry into the adventure of a lifetime. With talking hedges, samurai ghosts, meddling psychotherapists, and an inexplicably non-linear time pattern conspiring against him, Barry must do battle to save his hide, unleash the ninja within, and rescue his father from an ancient army, a dark sorcerer and a raging inferno.

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Tight Collar: A Bunch of Rhymes and Little Riffs, for Disenchanted Working Stiffs by Adrian Adamiec

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About Tight Collar: A Bunch of Rhymes and Little Riffs, for Disenchanted Working Stiffs by Adrian Adamiec:

Overworked? Underpaid? Generally less-than-in-love with your day job? Sounds like you’ll find something familiar to laugh (or cry) along to in this illustrated collection of humor poetry.

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Managed Care

About Managed Care:

Maxy Awards “Book of the Year” 2019

“Witty, occasionally crass, and an unqualified delight.” –KIRKUS REVIEWS

Is it too much to ask that a managed care facility refund a year’s advance payment when your grandfather dies before he can move in? Frank Johnson doesn’t think so, which is why the thirty-three-year-old now lives in a nursing home, locked in a chess match feud with management that doesn’t occupy nearly enough of his time.

When foster kid Elroy is thrust into his life, Frank decides to turn this forced relationship to his advantage – launching a string of absurd decisions, inappropriate behaviors and unexpected glimpses of tenderness that ultimately turn a New Jersey suburb upside down. A laugh-out-loud celebration of bad choices for good causes, Managed Care is an offbeat story about three misfits on the social fringes of suburbia and their ridiculous campaign to introduce an unfiltered version of intimacy to their stale, impersonal community. Because, according to Frank, it’s probably what Jesus would have wanted.

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Love Back

About Love Back:

Senzo Mabizela is a man of many talents. He can fit in with any crowd, hustle his way out of a tight spot, and bring back lost lovers – or at least pretend to do so long enough to trick lovesick customers out of their money. When his childhood nemesis seeks help to win over Ayanda, the girl they’ve both wanted since their school days, Senzo sees a chance to kill two birds with one con. If he plays his cards right, he can get revenge on his former bully, make a small fortune and win the heart of the woman he loves. But the game of love isn’t quite that simple…

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The Moskowitz Code

About The Moskowitz Code:

Just When You Thought it was Safe to be Healthy…
When his doctor mistakenly types the wrong code into his electronic medical record, Myron Moskowitz – Mike, to the entire world except his mother, Celia – finds life, or at least the one he’s grown used to, suddenly turned tush-over-teakettle. With that single dodgy digital diagnosis, a chain reaction is set in motion leading Mike to lose his job, accidentally get all trace of himself wiped off of every computer in the known universe, and seriously contemplate buying a Harley. And Mike isn’t exactly what you’d call a motorcycle kind of Moskowitz.
Somehow Mike must find a way to get back on the grid and get his old job back, all without his wife finding out about any of it.

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JOKES : Collection of Funny Jokes And Funny Short Stories

About JOKES : Collection of Funny Jokes And Funny Short Stories:

We always hear the words “laughter is the best medicine” and that most of the best moments are free. In this world, where we always feel anxious, we can only hold onto one hope that someday, everything will be fine. And of course, adding some laughter will lighten each day.

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Gonad The Barbarian and the Balls of the Dead

About Gonad The Barbarian and the Balls of the Dead:

In the lost years between the time that the oceans drank Atlantis and the rise of the sons of Anus, a great warrior travelled the land, searching for his long lost brother, axe in hand, shield on arm, maybe stopping for the odd drink and a bite to eat, he was… a big hairy nut named Gonad the Barbarian.
Join this great warrior in an adventure entitled Gonad the Barbarian and the Balls of the Dead. Will he escape a battering from a bunch of Aesols? Will he survive the terrors of the ancient lost city? And is it opening time yet?
A silly book for adults, containing silly content and adult content.

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The Cover Up

About The Cover Up:

What links a webcam girl, a cross-dressing police chief and an escaped ferret?

A British nation torn by Brexit staggers on. Frankie Ferret, a pre-school children’s TV celebrity escapes into sewers of London and surely is dead. The people unite in grief. Police Chiefs, counselors and politicos stand in tear stained sincerity with the common people. Viktor Pinupskin of Russia offers a genetically modified bear cub with his own face as a substitute. Internet bots urge a vote and attempt to sway the masses. Chaos and panic threaten to destroy the economy.

Into the mix steps young police inspector Crispin Bissel. His mission is to lead the search and target PR for the cops. His ex girlfriend, Selena Fontesse is a mature ex web cam girl specializing in veggie porn. She has the looks and the bosom to comfort a people broken by sorrow.
Could love be re-kindled over an open drain? Could Frankie be alive? Could a billionaire, a hot air balloon, a pop star, and a staring messianic child bring happiness back to a population in despair? And what if the big plans were to fail?

What if there were a cover up?

A deplorable basket case of a book. All right thinking people should be offended. Cross dressing vegan cannibals will love this story. There’s no safe space on campus when a ferret like Frankie gets into the pipes. A tender love story, an outrageous unfair satire, an expose of the media-cult whirl in which we live where news, fake news and spin are the currencies of coercion.

Buy this book and forgive yourself for laughing. It’s not incorrect if you didn’t mean to.

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Baby Pigeon – BY Matt Bird

About Baby Pigeon – BY Matt Bird:

Matt Bird is a successful 40-odd year old in many ways, but perhaps not in love. His romantic history to date consists of four serious relationships and none of these began online. He has never been married or had kids and he has only had one and half one-night stands. He lives alone with his cats, Smirnoff and Dave, in a small rural town in Devon. He jokes his home-town has a population of 30,000 yet only five different surnames.

Let’s just say in Matt’s town all the good girls are all taken – the ones who are left are single for a reason, even if that reason is they’re just not interested in him. After yet another failed relationship, and against his father’s advice of, don’t go looking for love, let love come to you, he turned to online dating – and failed once again! But this time he is fighting back. This time he has written about his dating experiences to share the trauma, strife and comedy of trying to find love in the digital world.

If his life was put into a power ballad, the opening lyrics to Gloria Gaynor’s I Will Survive would read like this:

His first time was in a metro, he was terrified

He told her he was experienced, but he kind of lied

She was a big girl, and there’s something you should know

I think he stuck it in her belly button, but hey it’s still a hole

So, he wrote a book, about his life

His search for love and his online dating strife

He’s got quite a story to tell and some of it’s not fun

Including one and half one-night stands and two fingers up his bum… He did SURVIVE!

He thought finding love should be a straight-forward process, but he soon learned otherwise. Even though on paper he should be the perfect man for a lady since he has no baggage, dating in the 21st century has changed. With apparently one in

three couples meeting online, Matt tries to find the answer to the eternal question: Does online dating actually work?

Clocking up many dating miles and keeping a detailed journal of his countless disastrous dates, Matt soon learns everybody is looking for love, but it’s a tricky beast to find. Since learning people in relationships live longer, therefore with life expectancy at stake, he has made it his mission to find love – and a breeding partner. After all, men get broody too.

Ironically his cats have taught his so much. Smirnoff, for example, taught him the meaning of love after he was knocked down by a yellow metro. Matt’s still not sure if it was same yellow metro he lost his virginity in 20 years previously, but there’s more about that to come. The vet put Smirnoff’s head back on at a cost of £400 – and people say money can’t buy you love.

Matt can’t promise to offer you all the answers, but he can share all his wisdom and his errors. At least, he can eliminate some of the ways love can’t be found, reducing the possibilities for failure.

The book is intended as a warm and positive book about looking for love, and living with not finding it – after all Matt is still single; that’s a plot spoiler I know, but it’s better to be honest. We all deserve love, but not all of us will find it; not online anyway

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The Diary of DaddyShortLegs: Experiences of a Dad at home with his baby

About The Diary of DaddyShortLegs: Experiences of a Dad at home with his baby:

DaddyShortLegs’ baby has landed. Here are his brutally honest and hilarious musings about that life-changing, wonderful and pretty scary fact. The intention was to start posting from Day One but it turns out that new humans cause a six-month delay on ANYTHING getting done – washing, eating and writing a diary take a back seat. It will be a steep learning curve.

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There’s Got to Be a Full Moon! Humorous memoirs of a dog groomer By Kathy Weber

About There’s Got to Be a Full Moon! Humorous memoirs of a dog groomer By Kathy Weber:

Dotty Moran has owned and operated a dog grooming business for forty-six years. She’s had enough laughs out of it to last her a lifetime. Discover the ups and downs of dog-grooming in There’s Got To Be A Full Moon!

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Obama Confidential: Strange, Odd & Bizarre Letters to the 44th President

About Obama Confidential: Strange, Odd & Bizarre Letters to the 44th President:

In this outrageous collection of fake “letters” to the 44th President of the United States, Barack Obama, we’re offered a startling inside look at what’s on the minds of Americans today. From celebrities as diverse as Warren Buffett, Bill Clinton, and Steven Spielberg, to anonymous everyday citizens like the minimum-wage waitress in Oklahoma and a dry cleaner named Al Kayda in Wisconsin, Obama hears it, and gets it, from everyone. And when you’re the president, absolutely no subject is off-limits. An ex-student in Illinois is drowning in an ocean of debt; a harried housewife in Wyoming has dubious ideas about how to save hard-earned pennies; while a gun owner in Tennessee vigorously defends his right to bear arms. Even a Harvard classmate re-appears, with a not-so-subtle demand for money. Obama, who’s obviously a very busy man, sometimes answers with a brief innocuous letter of his own. Echoing another classic of U.S. history, Alexis de Tocqueville’s ‘Democracy In America’, ‘Obama Confidential’ offers a vivid, consistently amusing snapshot of America in the second decade of the 21st century, with hilarious results.

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Girth by Alex Henderson

About Girth by Alex Henderson:

Size matters. Or at least it does to Ed, nit-picking quantity surveyor and captain of his local pub football team who has faked a business trip abroad to get some cheap plastic surgery.
Ed intends to be even more of a man upon his return. But has he managed to keep this as secret as he thinks? Will this really be such a wonderful surprise for Fiona on their wedding night? And just who is this operation for anyway?
Alex Henderson’s outrageous comedy debut shows what it means to be a man with a small problem that just got bigger.
Much bigger!

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Brand-New Quotes, One-liners, and Short Jokes: A Collection of Humorous Materials You Won’t Find Anywhere By Dave J. Shelton

About Brand-New Quotes, One-liners, and Short Jokes: A Collection of Humorous Materials You Won’t Find Anywhere By Dave J. Shelton:

This is the second installment in the series, and everything in here is even fresher, funnier and, as usual, straight to the punchlines. As with the first installment, you won’t find those cliched materials—that’s what the internet’s for. After all, time is so precious it should only be wasted wisely.
In this installment, you get memorable quotes, witty one-liners, and humorous short jokes on knowledge, wisdom, science, technology, time, intelligence, money, politics, government, relationship, marriage, love, relationship, beauty, health, success, etc. There are also materials to motivate and inspire you, so you know that it’s well, even inside a well (although, outside is obviously better). Some humorous but somewhat true definitions have also been included. Also, in order to aid understanding, keywords have been italicized.
Tom Willis, the fellow who is capable of the sublime in one minute and pure foolery in the very same minute, is back, and back with a bang. I couldn’t help but create more space for him in this installment. You also get to meet our new doctor, the one who took the hypocritical oat and, therefore, likes to make a meal (or mess, if you like) of everything.
Although this is not the go-to book for aspiring clowns, you can rest assured that the contents of this book will breathe new life into your talks, speeches, tweets, writings, etc.
This book is ideal for the young, the old, and the age-is-just-a-number crew.

Snippets from this book

******
Don’t show bias: treat fools, idiots, morons, and nincompoops equally. After all, they’re all equally useless.

******
Once, a computer beat me at chess. Next time, I came fully prepared—with the right screwdrivers.

******
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool only than to speak and reveal the mouth odor as well.

******
Don’t lie; you will never be able to do it better than the politicians.

******
Fools: morons with the least number of brain neurons.

******
Honesty pays, but crime pays faster.

******
My family was so poor…we rarely had enough to eat, never mind renting an apartment in the slums.

******
TOM’S FRIEND: There’s this designer shirt that costs 5,000 dollars; it requires no washing, pressing, doesn’t get wet, and has a lovely, permanent fragrance.
TOM WILLIS: And it has the money-back option in case of theft?

******
What a man can do, a woman can make him do it better.

******
If a jobless man sleeps around, he’s just homeless; If a jobless woman does same, she’s a sex worker.

******
Love all, but trust only dogs.

******
Everyone’s born with greatness; the problem is, it typically goes out with the umbilical cord.

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Tribespotting: Undercover Cult(ure) Stories by Harmon Leon

About Tribespotting: Undercover Cult(ure) Stories by Harmon Leon:

Legendary infiltration journalist Harmon Leon has gone undercover again and returned with a new book. Gentleman cartoonist Keith Knight provides popular comics that enhance Leon’s enlightening narrative.

“This book was eye-opening …” –David Litt, author of NY Times bestseller Thanks, Obama

The United States is a divided country, where two disparate tribes fight to provoke, condemn, and defeat the other. In Tribespotting: Undercover Cult(ure) Stories, Harmon Leon dives directly into the eye of the tribal storm, drastically changing his look and attitude as he goes undercover in an exploration of tribal behavior and its many manifestations in modern culture.

Employing the same inimitable style that he honed while infiltrating extremist groups, Leon introduces readers to a series of vastly different tribes, including a gathering of five thousand assault weapons fanatics, a clan of white supremacists who recruit at Applebee’s, a church of hookers who walk the streets for Jesus, and a meeting of cult members who stare at their leader’s handsome face.

Some of these tribes engage in harmless, hobby-loving fellowship while others revolve around the adulation of charismatic celebrities. Some of these tribes strive to uplift the individual via religious enlightenment, and a few are actually full-blown cults. But at the root of all these different tribes lies the same psychological need—the desire to be around like-minded people.

With that in mind … LET’S DO SOME TRIBESPOTTING!

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The MisreadBible: Genesis by J. R. Eldridge

About The MisreadBible: Genesis by J. R. Eldridge:

A collection of twisted Bible tales from the warped mind of J. R. Eldridge. Drawing from his fascination with religion and mythology, Eldridge takes the reader on a journey from the creation of the universe to the arrival of the Israelites in Egypt in this blasphemously funny retelling of the Book of Genesis.

A lonely deity creates the universe in his mother’s basement and makes a little clay man who falls in love with his own rib. After the humans engage in some freaky angel sex, God decides to flood the entire world, saving only a drunkard called Noah and his family.
Once the humans have repopulated the Earth, God chooses one man called Abram, drags him from his home in the middle of the night, changes his name, and then tells him to kill his son, forming an everlasting covenant with him and his descendants.

Later, Jacob steals his brother’s birthmark, boinks his cousins, and comes up with an innovative way to breed sheep. He fathers a dozen kids including Joseph, whose brothers get tired of his dreams of grandeur and sell him to some shapeshifting Ishmaelites who take him to Egypt.

The author invites readers to look up the original verses to see how much of the absurdity comes from his warped imagination, and how much comes from the original stories.

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Not Going Gently by Alex Henderson

About Not Going Gently by Alex Henderson:

Things aren’t going so well for elderly widower Mitch.
His daughter thinks he’s rushed himself into a residential dementia centre before he becomes a burden upon her. In truth he’s more worried that if he doesn’t lock himself away then the secrets of his past will get out.
The care home could be a whole lot nicer, but it’s all he can afford and, anyway, Mitch is determined. He’s sold his house and signed his freedom away. Let them take care of him for the muddled remainder of his days.
Except that he’s not really in need of a place like this yet. And far worse – his former best friend and old band mate Ray is already here.
The last person he’d ever want to be trapped with.
Especially since the secrets are about him.
With a cast of vivid characters who will shock and delight in equal measure, Alex Henderson’s latest is a poignant and darkly hilarious tale of friendship, regret and the need to squeeze the juice out of every day we’re given.

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Oceans Away

About Oceans Away:

𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐬 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞, 𝐬𝐡𝐞’𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐟𝐮𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐞.

Adopted as an infant, Ireland Leighton grew up in the heart of the Midwest. After inheriting millions from her biological parents, she is determined to help others any way she can. The only string is a business engagement with another millionaire. Ireland returns to Iowa years later to plan her brother’s tropical wedding. The festivities would be easier if her sexy ex-boyfriend stayed out of reach and her future wasn’t already planned.

Time suppressed his feelings for the girl next door, but Gideon Taggart isn’t about to let Ireland escape again. Farmer by day, veterinarian by choice, his second chance with his first love is far from easy. He soon discovers that no matter how much he loves Ireland, she’ll always choose her family over a future with him.

𝑂𝑐𝑒𝑎𝑛𝑠 𝐴𝑤𝑎𝑦 𝑖𝑠 𝑏𝑜𝑜𝑘 𝑡𝑤𝑜 𝑖𝑛 𝑆𝑘𝑦𝑒 𝑀𝑐𝑁𝑒𝑖𝑙’𝑠 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑛𝑑-𝑎𝑙𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑚𝑝𝑜𝑟𝑎𝑟𝑦 𝑟𝑜𝑚𝑎𝑛𝑐𝑒 𝑠𝑒𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑠, 𝐴𝑡𝑙𝑎𝑠. 𝐸𝑎𝑐ℎ 𝑏𝑜𝑜𝑘 𝑐𝑜𝑛𝑡𝑎𝑖𝑛𝑠 𝑎 𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑙𝑖𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑖𝑟𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑒𝑛𝑣𝑦, 𝑠𝑛𝑜𝑟𝑡-𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑡ℎ𝑦 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑑𝑦, 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑣𝑖𝑠𝑖𝑡𝑠 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑎𝑛𝑦 𝑏𝑒𝑎𝑢𝑡𝑖𝑓𝑢𝑙 𝑐𝑖𝑡𝑖𝑒𝑠 𝑖𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑤𝑜𝑟𝑙𝑑. 𝑌𝑒𝑠, 𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑜𝑓 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡, 𝑝𝑙𝑢𝑠 𝑒𝑎𝑐ℎ 𝑛𝑜𝑣𝑒𝑙 𝑒𝑛𝑑𝑠 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑎 𝑓𝑎𝑏𝑢𝑙𝑜𝑢𝑠 𝐻𝐸𝐴.

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