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Speaking in Tungs by Karla M. Jay

Speaking in Tungs by Karla M. Jay

A new job in rural Pennsylvania. How hard can five patients be?

In this entertaining novel set in rural Pennsylvania, a young woman from San Francisco searches for her birth parents while beginning her first job as a home-health speech pathologist. She soon learns how hard one job can be as she navigates the backwoods of Tungston, (“Tungs”) trying to comply with the needs of her quirky patients, all the while being stalked by a violent fugitive, and finding herself unexpectedly falling for the charms of a small-town, including one hot fireman. Through no fault of her own, she exposes a criminal who has been safely hidden in the thick forest, and now as he tries to stop her from exposing him, her patients’ lives, as well as her own are in jeopardy.

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Pianist in a Bordello by Mike C. Erickson

Pianist in a Bordello by Mike C. Erickson

Pianist in a BordelloWhat would happen if a politician decided to tell the truth—the whole truth? Richard Youngblood, aspiring Congressman, is about to find out. He’s running on a platform of honesty and transparency—and against the advice of his friends and advisers he’s decided to start with himself. His autobiography will lay his entire life bare before voters just days before the election.And what a life he’s had. Born in a commune and named Richard Milhous Nixon Youngblood as an angry shot at his absent father, Richard grows up in the spotlight, the son of an enigmatic fugitive and the grandson of a Republican senator. He’s kidnapped and rescued, kicked out of college for a prank involving turkeys, arrested in Hawaii while trying to deliver secrets to the CIA…Dick Nixon Youngblood’s ready to tell all. He’ll even tell his readers about the Amandas—three women who share a name but not much else, and who each have helped shape and define the man he’s become. Are voters really ready for the whole truth?Are you?Pianist in a Bordello is a hilarious political romp through the last four decades of American history, from a narrator who is full of surprises.

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The Ultimate Collection of Punny and Awkward Book of Dad Jokes

About The Ultimate Collection of Punny and Awkward Book of Dad Jokes

Get ready for the ultimate collection of pun-tastic dad jokes that are sure to make friends and family groan for all the right reasons! This handy illustrated guide contains hundreds of the corniest, cheesiest, and most awkward dad jokes guaranteed to embarrass your loved ones.

Filled with timeless classics that have a proven track record of leaving audiences speechless, this book curates the finest dad jokes that only the most seasoned jokesters can appreciate. For anyone looking to up their dad joke game, this book will become your most valuable resource packed with step-by-step instructions on perfecting your delivery, the key elements of a great joke, and a “Pun Master” crash course.

Whether you’re a lifelong dad joke enthusiast or simply aspire to be the new corny king of the neighborhood, this book promises to deliver.

Inside you’ll find hundreds of award-worthy classics like:
-“To the guy that invented zero: Thanks for nothing.”
– “Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? It was two-tired!”
– “What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese!”
– “Why couldn’t the lifeguard save the hippie? He was too far out, man.”

Accompanied by clever and humorous illustrations and stunning graphics, this book explores and celebrates the awkward charm of dad humor. It proves that for as cringe-worthy as they can be, dad jokes represent a simple joy that brings people together. An act of sharing a laugh-even if it is at your own expense- helps strengthen the bonds between loved ones and reminds us all not to take ourselves too seriously.

Embrace the power of awkwardness. Pick up this collection of the greatest puns and play on words ever assembled. But be warned: Once you start digging into the lawn of fatherly fumblings, you may never stop craving more of that cheesy goodness!

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Pianist in a Bordello by Mike C. Erickson

Pianist in a Bordello by Mike C. Erickson

Pianist in a BordelloWhat would happen if a politician decided to tell the truth—the whole truth? Richard Youngblood, aspiring Congressman, is about to find out. He’s running on a platform of honesty and transparency—and against the advice of his friends and advisers he’s decided to start with himself. His autobiography will lay his entire life bare before voters just days before the election.And what a life he’s had. Born in a commune and named Richard Milhous Nixon Youngblood as an angry shot at his absent father, Richard grows up in the spotlight, the son of an enigmatic fugitive and the grandson of a Republican senator. He’s kidnapped and rescued, kicked out of college for a prank involving turkeys, arrested in Hawaii while trying to deliver secrets to the CIA…Dick Nixon Youngblood’s ready to tell all. He’ll even tell his readers about the Amandas—three women who share a name but not much else, and who each have helped shape and define the man he’s become. Are voters really ready for the whole truth?Are you?Pianist in a Bordello is a hilarious political romp through the last four decades of American history, from a narrator who is full of surprises.

Buy the book, and follow the author on social media:

Get This Humor Book.

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The Two Kebabs Trilogy

About The Two Kebabs Trilogy

Embark on a thrilling journey through the memoirs of Johnny Two Kebabs, the legendary ‘conscious vigilante,’ in this gripping trilogy of novellas.
In the first instalment, “From Russia With Chilli And Garlic Sauce,” Johnny uncovers a sinister plot involving a Russian assassination. As he delves deep into the conspiracy, he must navigate a treacherous web of lies and deceit.
In the second novella, “How I Found The G Spot,” Johnny takes on a different kind of challenge as he investigates the enigmatic conspiracy group known as G-Nome. Along the way, Johnny’s own vulnerabilities come to light, revealing the complex layers beneath his valiant facade.
Finally, in the third story, “The Mixed Doner Murders,” Johnny tackles his most perplexing case yet. As a series of gruesome murders shocks the city, he must unravel the twisted motives behind the notorious ‘Mixed Doner Murderer.’ With lives hanging in the balance, Johnny’s unwavering determination and sharp instincts are put to the ultimate test. These memoirs delve into the depths of Johnny Two Kebabs’ psyche. Discover his unique ‘philosophy’ and the unwavering ‘ethical’ code that guides his every move. This trilogy will leave you captivated, pondering the true nature of heroism and the power of a single individual in shaping the course of history.

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To My Dear Mom: 504 entertaining Sudoku puzzles with quotes on motherhood and mother/daughter relationships

About To My Dear Mom: 504 entertaining Sudoku puzzles with quotes on motherhood and mother/daughter relationships

No need for a special occasion to celebrate your mom!! Show her your appreciation by gifting her this book of 502 Sudoku puzzles (Easy, Medium, and Hard levels).

Each page features a quote reflecting the warmness of motherhood and the uniqueness of mother/ daughter relationships
Inside this book, you will find:
1) Personalized first page
2) 502 Sudoku puzzles (Easy, Medium, and Hard Levels)
3) 251 Quotes from well-known people such as Michelle Obama, Oprah Winfrey, that reflect the meaning of motherhood
4) Solutions at the end of the book.

Why Sudoku puzzles? Solving Sudoku puzzles helps with
1) Concentration and patience
2) Improve mental health by managing stress
3) Memory improvement
4) Keep brain active
5) much more!!

If you’re looking for a unique Sudoku puzzles book, then grab this book TODAY.

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Meandering Sobriety

About Meandering Sobriety

Thinking is a fundamental activity of our species – those that give names to other creatures and call themselves humans. Textbooks tell us that there is about 1.2 kg of matter called the brain inside the human body. It sounds small but actually is proportionally the biggest among all animals on Earth.

I became more aware of thinking at around 5th grade upon hearing about an ancient paradox. It can be summarized as follows.

¤

Once upon a time, there was a stupid king. In his kingdom lived a sage who was highly respected for his intelligence. The King did not appreciate this fact. Maybe the Sage made fun of the King’s intellect, but I am not so sure. Anyway, one day, the King summoned the Sage, intending to kill him.

The King said, “Wise man, I heard you earn a living by thinking and arguing. Now I give you two options to die.”

The Sage said, “Please tell me the choices, Your Majesty.”

The King continued, “You live by your tongue, so I will let you say one sentence before you die. If what you say is true, you will die by hanging. If what you say is false, you will die by beheading.”

Little did the King know that this was a stupid order. After a short while, the Sage confidently spoke his “last words”, which actually were what saved his life:

“Your Majesty, I am about to be beheaded!”

¤

As a “wild animal” going out into life from a young age, my brain spent a lot of time and energy looking for food. Now that I have become older, my body no longer needs so much sustenance. However, my mind craves a different type of nourishment: food for thought.

Food for thought can directly lead to food (on the table). My main job as a scientist exemplifies what I have just stated. Maybe we were wrong. Maybe it has been “thought for food” all along, like in such a sequence as TFFTTTFTFFTTFFFT…
In the hyper-chaotic infosphere today, we are surrounded by the noises of information, not only as wavy shores or waterfalls but also mega-tsunamis, through Twitter, Facebook, Tiktok, Instagram, Youtube, etc. More than ever, tranquility and calmness are necessary. Like what you have seen in wilderness video clips, predators such as lions, bears, and alligators act lightning-fast when catching prey. But when food is served, the natural world returns to its peaceful, soothing silence.

This short book is in its own tidy infosphere, where each little story is also brief and self-contained. Despite this small appearance, I hope the content inside carries the value of tranquility and life observation. The book is petite, but pretty sure not malnourished. A not-too-small detail is that the way the content was shaped and distilled reflects some innovations of mine and my research team: the mindsponge theory, a new theory of serendipity, the bayesvl R package, the BMF analytics, as well as other experiences from working in the field of science. After all, scientific works were my main source of food (before this book sells well – if it does).

Much of the content, seemingly fragmented, has reflected our lab’s essential cultural values, which have led to mindsponge theory, BMF analytics and related works. Thus, under the analytical paradigm of these closely-connected concepts, the pieces come together as bits and pieces of one whole thing. I think it is a bit unfair to tell about things in a house without mentioning the house itself.

Welcome to the priceless sober moments – with a chicken-burger price tag!

I hope this book will bring readers some moments of calmness, peaceful smiles, and maybe a couple of good laughs too.

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Meandering Sobriety

About Meandering Sobriety

Mental freedom comes when the mind is sober from the dream within itself – the dream of life. This notion takes the form of the book “Meandering Sobriety” by Quan-Hoang Vuong. Readers will not find complicated philosophical arguments or hard-to-digest scientific results in this book. But in essence, the book is an invitation to look at how we have been looking at life, or in other words: to think about thinking. Inside the book are about 40 very short stories depicting various peculiar angles of reality. The writing is light on the eyes, and the content is light on the mind. Each story is like a sip of a different kind of tea that help you see through the fog of thoughts a little bit further.

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The How-Not-To Guide To Parenting And Marriage by Jon Ziegler

About The How-Not-To Guide To Parenting And Marriage by Jon Ziegler

“Why do you always have to say something? Can’t you, just once, not say anything?”
I had just annoyed my daughter for the third time in a five-minute conversation by telling her she was making a poor choice by paying more for jeans that came with holes already in them. . . which was true . . .but why did I have to say it? She was twenty years old, and if she wanted to pay more for jeans that were ripped and holey rather than pay less for jeans with no holes or rips, who was I to say anything about it? Yet, I couldn’t stop myself. I was that dad.

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Small Stories: A Perfectly Absurd Novel

About Small Stories: A Perfectly Absurd Novel

The Town Administrator is extorting residents!
Subversive senior citizens are on the march!
Crazed ponies rampage through the streets!
Exclamation marks keep popping! up! everywhere!

Duncan and Maya Small have just relocated to a new town. Again. And almost immediately, Duncan is ready to move on thanks to a power-obsessed local official who has it out for him. But Maya has ideas of her own.

The Smalls soon discover nothing in their new town is at it seems, but one thing is certain – there’s something funny going on.

Small Stories: A Perfectly Absurd Novel, is a comic tale about life, power, and new beginnings in a quirky little town that’s decidedly off-the-wall, yet remarkably familiar. It’s about the last Welcome Wagon, secret societies, and bake sales. It’s about Duncan Small’s fixation on process and Maya Small’s unforeseen celebrity. It’s about unexpected friendships, which may turn out to be the best kind there are.

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Coffee Cups & Wine Glasses. Hilarious Secrets to Heal a Broken Heart & Get Your Life Back! by Debbie Seagle

About Coffee Cups & Wine Glasses. Hilarious Secrets to Heal a Broken Heart & Get Your Life Back! by Debbie Seagle

Discover the one word that will change your life forever; this inspirational collection of irreverent tales and ingenious schemes is woven into a series of hilarious triumphs filled with love, grief, and mischief. You can laugh, you may cry, but you will ultimately be entertained and redirected in remarkable ways.

Uncover unusual secrets for getting on with your life after a big disappointment, loss, or divorce. No matter what you’ve been through, every reader (you) will achieve a heightened sense of happiness and a deeper level of confidence. You’ll rearrange your attitude with activities you never thought of.

Full of
Encouragement
Enlightenment
Life Hacks
Recipes
Healing
Travel Blooper Remedies
Fun facts about potatoes, dogs, & various other varmints
Gut-busting inspiration to create happiness all around you
You’ll not only learn how to revitalize yourself (you’ll love this chapter); you will find remarkable ideas to enhance your notoriety before you croak. PLUS, a sure-fire plan for getting your life back.
It’s a Journal
A Vision Board
It’s entertaining, comical, & inspiring
Coffee Cups & Wine Glasses is the perfect gift for yourself, your friends, and anyone who needs a lighthearted boost and a new outlook on life.

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Jonathan’s Trip to the Other Side

About Jonathan’s Trip to the Other Side

Jonathan’s Trip to the Other Side’ is a comic fantasy for children & young adults, relating the events of a camping break which turned into an outlandish adventure for Jonathan Trenchcoat, Jethro the blacksmith, and Transport the camel.

It all starts as a result of a little inter-dimensional flux; when a hole appears in the trouser pocket of the universe. It’s not so much a black hole, just one which could do with a spot of emergency darning. But like a missing manhole cover on the sidewalk of life… you just know that someone is going to fall through it. So Jonathan and Jethro arrive in a land where Mother Nature is on holiday, Grandma Chaos is in charge, time has a tendency to travel in curves, and the laws of physics only apply on weekdays after 7pm.

Jonathan and Jethro are given a task to perform in order to earn passage back to their own dimension. It’s not an impossible task, they just have to find a crystal ball, and apparently it came through the wormhole just before they did. The only problem is that someone has already claimed it. By now it could have been melted down to make a nice pair of ornamental vases.

It’s a race against time, and time doesn’t like to lose.

The colourful landscape is peppered with characters such as Zabbadoc the Wealthy, brother of Zebroc the not Quite so Wealthy, cousin to Hammal the Positively Stinking Rich; a desert nomad race to whom bartering is a not just a way of life, it’s a religion… and one which they fervently encourage others to join. Then there’s the forest dwelling Two-Feet tribe, a race whose pursuit of gastronomic perfection is only tempered by the limitation of the size their stomachs; and whose bible is a recipe book.

It is a book for those who like their humour ‘off the wall’ rather than off the peg. As Jonathan himself might say ‘It’s the kind of book you just can’t put down… it must be something to do with the chewing gum on the cover.’

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The Festivus Haggadah

About The Festivus Haggadah

This Festivus Haggadah uses the classic haggadah as its template, and fuses as much of the Seinfeld canon – and particularly, the curious details of the Festivus holiday – as possible into it. It’s a tribute, an homage, a comedic fusion, and something you can enjoy around the Festivus or Passover table. Two holidays, for the low price of one.

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Last Chance California

About Last Chance California

Terrified he’s becoming just like his father, Wyatt Lewis, a disillusioned millennial, breaks up with his fiancée to chase his childhood dream – a fresh start in Southern California.

Once in San Diego, Wyatt reunites with an old friend, Summer Harrison, while falling hard for the elusive and free-spirited, Leah Murphy. Summer and Leah show Wyatt a dazzling world littered with lavish speakeasies, egregious drug use, and overpriced cocktails. Surrounded by fake glamor and stuck in a terrible corporate job, Wyatt’s escape turns into his worst nightmare.

Overworked, alone, and filled with regret, the aspiring writer spirals down a self-destructive path that forces him to confront the violent past he ran away to California to forget.

In his raw, hilarious, and dark debut novel, Brian Price showcases our world, on the verge of the COVID-19 pandemic, through the eyes of a sarcastic and stubborn narrator as he attempts to drown his family’s demons.

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The Tyranny of Desire by Morty Shallman

About The Tyranny of Desire by Morty Shallman

PUCHY MUSHKIN is a big dreamer and an even bigger loser whose spectacular failure as a human being is exceeded only by the enormity of his penis.
In the depths of his despair, Puchy has an epiphany: could the endless series of screw-ups that define his existence be the result of his overwhelming desire for the success he believes is his birthright? To test his theory and, hopefully, change his fate, Puchy vows to banish all dreams, goals, aims, ambitions, and obsessions from his life except one: to assassinate desire itself and hang it by its feet like Mussolini.

What follows is the hilariously dark, raunchy, and irreverent tale of one man’s twisted war with himself—an anti-story about an anti-hero whose only motivation is to have no motivation at all.

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The House of Dating Disasters by Angela Pearse

About The House of Dating Disasters by Angela Pearse

A page-turning romantic comedy set in Edinburgh and London with humorous antics, witty banter, an enemies-to-lovers romance and spice. Perfect for fans of Sophie Kinsella and Anna Maxted.

“Full of humour, misunderstandings, angst, crossed wires, secrets and mischief, all of these combine to make a really good read with some laugh out loud moments.”

The queen of online dating has met the man of her dreams. But her best friend found him first.

Aster’s been on more dates than she’s had hot dinners, from players to weirdos, she’s met them all. So, when flatmate and fellow dater Edie suggests a new approach to weed out the undesirables, she’s right on board.

It’s a great strategy, until Edie gets together with her physiotherapist. Aster can’t see why she likes him; he’s a know-it-all health nut who rubs her up the wrong way.

She tolerates him for Edie’s sake but when a friendship develops and, to her horror, a heart-thundering attraction, Aster has to face the uncomfortable truth—her best friend is dating the guy she’s been looking for.

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I am now Dog

About I am now Dog

I am now Dog

I am now Dog is dedicated to my Dad and my brother.

We are all bastards and get away with far too much in life. But life is pure and so are we. This is the reason I wrote I am now dog.

It’s funny, hip and toys with the human condition as well as current socio-political events in a way that that, frankly, turns my literary head on.

There is a debt of honour for Mikhail Bulgakov’s heart of the dog, which I felt, failed/meandered in many places.

Such is life, such are other people’s stories the foundation for which I borrow and steal ever so zealously wherever I can.

Do not fear for never will I fail to innovate and add in the new. Such is my want, such is my style.

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Coffee Cups & Wine Glasses. Hilarious Secrets to Heal a Broken Heart & Get Your Life Back! by Debbie Seagle

About Coffee Cups & Wine Glasses. Hilarious Secrets to Heal a Broken Heart & Get Your Life Back! by Debbie Seagle

This collection of shameless tales and ingenious schemes is woven into a series of hilarious triumphs filled with love, grief, and mischief. You can laugh; you may cry, but you will ultimately be inspired and redirected in a meaningful way – with a new perspective.

Discover the one word that will change your life.

Uncover outrageously unusual secrets for getting on with your life after a big disappointment, loss, breakup, or divorce. No matter what you’ve been through, every reader (you) will achieve a heightened sense of happiness and a deeper level of confidence than you ever imagined.

Inspirational stories and hilarious activities will awaken your genius and motivate you to revitalize your life in ways you never thought of.

You’ll not only learn how to tie knots when you’re at the end of your rope, pamper yourself (you’ll go back to this chapter for the rest of your life), and outsmart a bear; you will find remarkable ideas to enhance your notoriety before you croak. PLUS, a sure-fire plan for getting your life back.

Full of:
Encouragement
Enlightenment
Life Hacks
Recipes
Gut-busting inspiration to create happiness all around you
Gleeful tactics to escape humiliation, balconies, & boredom

Find the secret to true happiness.

It’s a Journal
It’s a Vision Board
It’s entertaining, comical, & inspiring

Coffee Cups & Wine Glasses is the perfect gift for yourself, your friends, and anyone who needs a lighthearted boost, a new outlook on life or needs to laugh hysterically with resilience and courage.

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Extracts from Noah’s Diary

About Extracts from Noah’s Diary

A century ago, a little known writer named Mark Twain wrote a silly novella called Extracts from Adam’s Diary. It imagined the recorded daily life of the first man. Two years later, Mr. Twain’s wife passed away, and he wrote a melancholy follow-up with Eve as the imagined diarist. Together, these stories were published as The Diaries of Adam & Eve.

A century later, a well known writer named Martin Bodek enjoyed the books, discovered that Twain left the concept for another to pick up where he left off, and decided to give it a try.

Yes, he’s that arrogant, he’s written a sequel for Mark Twain.

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Wouldn’t You Rather Be Laughing? by MuddyUm Editors

About Wouldn’t You Rather Be Laughing? by MuddyUm Editors

Good news, beloved reader! We bring you the japes, gobshite, and guttersnipe you crave. The editors of MuddyUm, a singularly hilarious publication, have collected stories so funny that the cares and woes of the world will flee your mind. Prepare your soul to be overtaken by the giddy daemon of comedy and you will be wondering only one thing:

“If I keep laughing like this, will I puke?”

We are well aware that the world has become a smoldering cesspit of:

– dysfunction,
– despair, and … well …
– cess. (We have to put it somewhere.)

The fifteen stories herein are designed to combat that very thing! Sure, you could worry about the war in Ukraine or the next plague, but why not learn fun facts about dolphin clitorises, the connection between eating frogs and productivity, Grandfather Iron Jaw’s sex tips, and someone’s — let’s call him “Zacchariah” even though his name is actually “Paul” – pelvic floor?

And if you don’t believe us, maybe you will believe our famous dead columnist Granny Mary!

“So, let me state the obvious. This anthology is good. Very good. I haven’t read an anthology with a collection of talent like this in hours. The abundance of comedy in these pages will leave your pants wet. It’s a shplotz. A shplotz of comedy.

Think of it this way. The entire goddamn world is going to shit, and you are reading a blurb written by a dead woman who was recently made famous for—get this—blowing her nose into dirty underwear. Wouldn’t you rather be laughing?”

Here’s what you get!

– Why We Live in a World Dominated by Men
– Ladies, Get Yours Today
– New Study Shows Negative Correlation Between Eating Frogs and Productivity
– How to Blow Your Nose into Dirty Underwear
– I Explain to a GenZer That There Were Once Only Three TV Networks
– Sex Education Tip — Keep Your Knees Together and Wear Clean Underwear
– My Unfavorite Things
– All Things Must Collapse
– Marine Scientists Discover That the Dolphin Clitoris Provides Pleasure
– Please Accept My Friend Request So I Can Make You Regret It
– I Left My Face Print On The Movie Theater And It Remained There For Five Years
– I’m Teaching My 12-Year-Old Son About Women
– Science Abandons Red Counties
– On Learning to Speak American
– My Neighbor Saw My Bare Butt

Ready to keep your knees together and wear clean underwear? Don’t wait any longer!

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